10 Healing Prayer

Hi there, so I'm going to be speaking to us today about where healing prayer fits in to the way that we counsel people. So, it fits into the broader context of counseling. As you've been meeting with people and spending time with people, you would have noticed certain things.

I'm sure by now you would have been asking them questions. Going through their life story. And just finding out things about them that you can pinpoint as to what you need to pray into. You would have looked at the rising. You would have trusted for God to begin to bring stuff to the surface as you counsel people.

And then I'm sure you would probably be taking notes. I constantly take notes and write down things that I notice in people's lives. Key words or key experiences that I think that they, would show me what, I need to pray into. There would be a recognition of those things.

Like, that was a really difficult experience that I had. Or, that moment in my life when such an event happened really hurt me in a negative way. Those kind of things, you just write down and you recognize that those are areas that, you heard the person.

The person should recognize that too. You recognize it too, that those could be areas to pray into. Some of the areas that we could have noticed as stuff comes to the surface, as people are sharing with us, are the following. It could be rejection, identity, anger, rage, violence, rebellion or control.

Addictions, fear or people pleasing, deception, a mocking, scoffing or prideful attitude. Lust, perversity, adultery, pornography. Woundings and traumas like molestation, or abuse, or rape. And things like guilt, shame, condemnation, bitterness, unforgiveness, resentment, hatred, and even doubt. As I am listening to people and I'm asking them questions, I'm looking for those kind of aspects in people's lives.

Where we just know that they've really been hurt and struggled with. And then what we want to do is we wanna allow the Lord into those spaces. So really what I'm sharing about today is how to access the Lord. How to come to the Lord.

Casting Burdens on the Lord in Healing Prayer

How to bring those things to Him through healing prayer. There is a wonderful scripture that I often refer to. 1 Peter 5:7. It says, "cast your burdens onto the Lord because He cares for you." It's just such a wonderful thought. Firstly, God cares for us.

His heart is already positioned towards us. When we're counseling people, it is trusting and believing that we are not there alone with the people. That God is there with them, too. And He really cares for them. As they come to Him, with faith, with their hurts and their woundings, they come into a caring God.

But also then, it's not just that He cares for us, it's that we can cast our burdens onto Him. And that's the process of healing prayer for me. It's now no longer the horizontal, me sharing with somebody. It's now the vertical. Now actually that person bringing their stuff to the Lord.

We call it a divine exchange. I give God my hurt, my pain, my struggles, and then He gives me freedom, He gives me healing, He gives me peace. It's really beautiful, and it's such a wonderful experience. I find it very rewarding being a counselor, because I see how real God is, and how loving He really is.

He really does meet people in their point of need. He brings them through some of the most difficult things in their lives. He is amazing. I am sure you feel the same way with me as we counsel people together. How do we do this?

Repentance, Forgiveness, and Breaking Lies

How do we actually practice the divine exchange? Well, I believe it's three things. It's repentance, forgiveness, and breaking any lies that we have believed. It is these things that have blocked the flow of God over our lives. And 1 John 1:9 really kicks us off with repentance.

It says this, "If we confess our sins, He is faithful and just. He will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness." There is the transaction. If we confess our sins, He is faithful and just. He forgives and He purifies. And that's the exchange that we see.

So, what does a person need to repent of? Well, it's sin that we have done. Sin that we have taken part in. Sin that we have inflicted, onto others. And we need to say sorry for that. We know with sin comes hurt and pain and disappointment and struggle.

So as we bring the sin to God, we're also bringing the hurt, the pain, the resultant effects of that sinful interaction with somebody to God, too. It would be a sinful choices or simple responses. It is really important that the person recognizes that they own that sin, that that sin is offensive to God.

Sin is terrible to God. A sin is opposite to who God is. Being such a pure and holy God. Sin really is a big struggle. It is not just feeling better, it's really owning the fact that I have done something that has caused God pain and myself pain as well in the process.

So, repentance is really, really key. What is the root sin the person needs to repent of? It's important to ask the person that question. As you're counseling, try to look for those roots. Where did something start? Sometimes I'll ask them the question, "Where did the struggle that you're in right now start?"

It causes people to actually think back and to think of an event. In that event, you ask the person, "What happened to you?" And invariably, there will be some sinful experience there. And if they have done something to somebody or to themselves, then, that's an area that I would mark.

I would go at a later stage, that is what they need to repent of. That's what they need to bring to God. It needs to be repented of, but not just the action of what was done, but also the motivation behind the action.

Sometimes we can forget that aspect. It is the underlying root. The underlying reason needs to be repented of, too. Because, that was the driving factor and the reason why the person would have done that sin. That needs to be brought to the Lord.

We need to listen for genuine repentance from the person. It needs to be a real recognizing of the fact that I have done something really wrong. And that sin hurt others and myself. And God, I'm really, really sorry. And I bring that to You.

Repenting of Generational Sin

It's a beautiful thing when you see God take that genuine repentance and sets people free. Another area where we can pray into repentance for people as things come up in their lives, as they're sharing is, with regards to their past, with regards to their family.

We call it the sins of the generations. Sometimes, sin done to us isn't necessarily, in the present. It might have been in the past as well. For example, a father practicing the occult or Eastern religion and something from their actions then coming and affecting us in the present day.

Sins of the generations really is reclaiming ground due to legal right an enemy has had due to sins of the generations in the past. A generational spirit will put pressure on the next generation to commit the same sin. So a generational sin would be like something that somebody really struggles to break.

Even after basic repentance, there might be a struggle with the person to really break something. And then it's worth investigating. Has this been a pattern in your family previously? And if so, who and what did they do? It is just trying to find out if there is a generational sin.

If something is passed down to the person that you're counseling. Generational sin and resultant open doors is relatively straightforward for me. So I actually have a prayer that I have written out that I just pray. I ask the person to repeat after me and we will go through it together.

It doesn't have to be long. It doesn't have to be involved. I do tailor-make that prayer for the person, but essentially it's the person handing over the sins of the fathers or grandparents. Just saying, "Lord, set me free from those things." Freemasonry prayer is quite a big area where we need to ask God to forgive people from.

I always see that when I pray for people in this, that it seems to have quite a hold on people. I remember somebody I prayed for who three times tried to deal with an area of his life that he struggled to break. He had a sense that it was through Freemasonry in his family line.

He came to me and said, "Ant, I really need this to be broken off." So, he brought that to us in the Lord, and we saw real breakthrough of his life. I remember approaching him about two weeks after we prayed together, as he just dealt with the sins of the forefathers.

Then on behalf of his relatives, just repenting of that sin and the hold that it had in his family. He felt major breakthrough. He said he never felt the same again. This is really amazing how, it can be really powerful. I know this is an area for some people that they struggle with.

They don't theologically agree with it, and that's totally fine if that's you. However, I do honestly believe that prayer is for free. I say that quite often with people that I counsel, and sometimes we don't know. Sometimes we don't know if there's actually something that's been done in our family lines that's come across to me, and if that's the case, well, let's pray a prayer, and let's trust for God to set the person free.

I strongly encourage you, if you're not sure, and if the person's willing, pray a prayer, where you can bring the sins of generations to the Father. You know what, if there's nothing there, there's nothing there. But if there is something there, then God will set them free, and it'll be amazing.

Repenting for Family Line Sin

Another area that we can bring repentance into is in the area of soul ties. An ungodly soul tie is a channel, much like a straw, through which mental and emotional things can flow. Demonic spirits can also transfer through soul ties. It seems to be like a connection with a person, when sin is done, that leaves a link open to that person.

Sometimes the person can be codependent on somebody else where sin was done. That's often a sign of a soul tie. The person might not even be in their life anymore. They might not have seen the person for a long time, but there's a drawing towards that person.

Or a struggling to let go of what happened with that person. And there could be a soul tie attached in that area. Sexual contact or sexual experiences is a big way where we see soul ties come with people. It just seems to be that those soul ties can be formed through sexual interactions.

Breaking Sexual Soul Ties

We know that sex is a beautiful thing in God's sight, but is made for marriage only. In the sanctity of marriage, with a husband and a wife and in that union. The Bible even says, "For this reason, the husband will be united to his wife and they'll become one flesh."

It's like a one flesh. It's a connection there. Many times I've prayed for people to break soul ties, especially when they've been in sexual relationships. How do you do that? Well, when you're praying with the person, you ask the person to repent for the unhealthy interactions done with that other person.

Then you ask God to break any spiritual bond between those people. There's also a written prayer that I use myself, that I often just read with people. It doesn't have to be long at all, but I've often seen breakthrough in power when praying that prayer.

Emotional Soul Ties and Idolatry

So that is an area that you can look at if people need to repent of any sinful interactions with people. Sometimes an ungodly soul tie can be emotional. So if it is a drawing to somebody for comfort, a drawing to somebody for value or worth, that's obviously unhealthy.

Because we should be looking to God first. He should be the one that we find value and worth in. So, if we feel that drawing to somebody else to make me feel better, there could be a soul tie there as well. It is realizing and repenting of looking to somebody else for comfort.

Essentially it's idolatry. It's looking to somebody else for my value and worth. You have to break that soul tie. It is not a healthy connection with somebody. The other area that we can look at and pray into and an area where we do the vertical connection with God in prayer, as we bring the areas that we've seen in people's lives through counseling to God, it is the area of forgiveness.

Forgiveness and Unforgiveness in Deliverance

The area of forgiveness is really powerful. I think a lot of demonic deliverance that I do is because of unforgiveness—resentment in someone's heart towards somebody else. Forgiveness is really massive to God as well. In fact, God says if we don't forgive others, He will not forgive us. In the Lord's Prayer, when the disciples asked Jesus how should we pray, Jesus said, "Lord forgive us our trespasses as we forgive those who trespass against us."

We can almost not ask God for forgiveness unless we are doing the same thing to others. It's really representing God's heart towards us and us being the same to other people. We forgive others for whenever they have done sin towards us. And it could be an action.

It could be words spoken. It could be spoken by parents, it could be spoken by siblings, or teachers, anyone in authority. When you're counseling someone, what you do is you're looking for those interactions with other people where the person you're counseling has been genuinely hurt.

Key moments in their lives. As you're going through a person's life or asking them various questions, those are the things that you're looking for. What I normally do is, as I am listening to somebody, I'm writing that stuff down and then I'm highlighting where repentance needs to be taking place.

I don't stop them right there. I let them finish. Often as you are counseling you will probably find key words and patterns through the person's life. And then you'll know, okay, this is quite a strong root in someone's life. And it's maybe an experience that they had in their past that they've taken into adulthood.

It's become part of the way that they live. Then you know that when you go into time of actually bringing these things to the Lord in prayer, that's something you really want to focus on. It is the same thing with forgiveness, too. They could be really key moments in a person's life.

We often go through difficult moments with many people in our lives. This world isn't easy and we have interactions with people all the time. But there will be really key moments where wounding comes in. It's those people that need to be forgiven, that the person you're counseling needs to be able to forgive.

When Forgiveness Feels Impossible

I believe there's no real freedom without forgiveness. And sometimes the wounds can hurt us so deeply that forgiving the offender may feel impossible. You might find that too. Personally, unforgiveness is really difficult. When I first got saved, I really struggled to even understand how to forgive.

I felt there was so much of a defense mechanism in me that when I got hurt, I would draw these lines between me and someone else. And I could justify saying, "I'm protecting myself." But actually, I know that what I was doing was holding judgment against the person.

And blocking them. Blocking the relationship between me and the person. It is offensive to God and it's not God's heart towards us. It's not His heart that we should have for others, too. So, it was an area that I needed to repent of.

It can be really difficult. Especially if it's a traumatic experience. Something that really affects the person in a difficult way. Forgiveness can be really difficult, and I want to encourage you to help someone. If you know somebody who struggles to forgive. I see it quite regularly.

When I encourage the person to realize that they need to hand this area over to God, it can be difficult. But really what you do for somebody who might be struggling to forgive is just empathize with the person. Help them to know that you understand.

You can imagine how difficult it would be to hand over that area. Because it sounds a very difficult thing they experienced. But also help them to understand that God commands us to forgive others. But also that it sets us free. Unforgiveness holds us in a prison.

We think we are giving judgment to others. We letting them know that the way they hurt them is not acceptable. But, in the same space, we're actually blocking ourselves from the flow of God. And we're putting ourselves in a prison. Often the person doesn't even know that we have resentment towards them.

Yet, for us, it is an actual blockage that forms. And the life of God can't flow properly through to us. It's important for people to recognize that forgiveness is not letting the offender off the hook. It's not saying that what happened to them is okay.

It's definitely not saying that. It is recognizing, however, that it's not up to me now to hold judgment against that person. Lord, I give that judgment over to You. You are now the One who will judge that person. The reality is that we will all face the judgment of the Lord, one day.

We will all stand before God and give an account of our lives. Every single one of us. God will hold people to account for what they've done to people's lives. It's not up to us to do that anymore. And it's not letting people off the hook and saying, it's okay what you did.

But really what it is, is it's releasing the person to God and allowing God to be the Judge of their lives. And no longer for us to hold that role. Forgiveness is not letting the abuse reoccur. It's not saying what you did was okay, so go ahead and walk all over me.

We don't have to tolerate or open ourselves up to repeated harm. So that's also the thing, is that we can forgive, but there's also healthy boundaries. And it'll be for you as a counselor to gauge that with the person and to help them to recognize the difference between the two.

Forgiveness is also a conviction. It's not an event. If people struggle to forgive, I don't want to push them to say something they don't mean. It must be an inward conviction in their own heart. It's not an event because it's what we do in counseling.

So I work with the person with that. I even say to them, if you're not ready to forgive right now, then I encourage you to go home and really pray and ask the Father to help you to forgive somebody. I also help them to understand that forgiveness isn't feelings first.

You don't feel necessarily to forgive somebody, and then you act because you feel to forgive. It's actually an action. I choose to forgive because God wants me to do that. I choose to hand the person and what they did to me over to the Lord.

And to trust that He is just in who He is over the person's life. And to not harbor that judgment in my own heart. But people need to own that for themselves and be able to genuinely let people go. So, I encourage it for it to be in a conviction of people.

I do say this to people too, that sometimes people feel they need a lot of forgiveness in their hearts to be able to forgive somebody. And obviously it depends on what they've gone through. But I don't believe that that's how God works. Jesus says, "If you have faith the size of a mustard seed, you can tell a mountain to move."

He doesn't look for a lot of faith to move mountains. Often, forgiving someone who's done something difficult for us can feel like a real mountain to face. But not to God. I think He just looks for a little bit. Do I have a little bit of faith to believe that I can forgive this person and God can set me free?

And I would say, absolutely. Because God just looks for our confession. He's the one who's faithful and just and He's the one who purifies us. That's why I encourage people too. And often when people get that understanding they're able to genuinely forgive. You will feel it in the room and the person will feel it, too.

Forgiveness as an Inward Conviction and Choice

They should feel a release from something they held in their hearts. I want to say this too, that sometimes you need to recognize when you're counseling somebody and look for ungodly beliefs or lies that have been believed by the person. When sin is done to us, we carry something in our hearts.

And often, if that sin is repetitive or traumatic, it can really dictate and speak something of our identity and worth. So for example, if someone is abused sexually as a child, what you will find most likely is that there's a sense of dirtiness, a sense of being unvaluable.

That I don't count. And the child will feel shame. Or a sense that I can't tell anybody because it's shameful and I'm embarrassed. Then, the lie not dealt with could become that I don't have value in life. The result of that lie would be that I wouldn't have good boundaries for myself.

Or I would have people walk all over me. So the lie would be carried into many aspects, if not every aspect of that person's life. It might not be as heavy as sexual abuse for a child, but it could be any lie you believe.

Words of authority are powerful. When we have somebody who is an authority role over our lives that we look up to. Invariably our parents, especially as children. If we believe what they say, and when we take that to heart, it can literally affect how we see ourselves.

That is definitely something to look at when you are praying with or counseling somebody, to know what to pray into. These are identified as the person shares hurtful experiences, or even lack of needs met. Most often in a lie that they believe. You are partnering with something that was said over them.

Some things that you can be aware of when someone is sharing is word curses spoken over the person. So for example, I remember praying for a friend whose mother always used to say that he was useless. And that he was ugly. So, I remember praying for him and he's in his 30s now and really struggling to hold down his value in his own heart.

And the results of that lie that he believed because his mother speaking those things over him was that he had a major low confidence in his life. He would look to comfort in other places. And he would actually self-medicate. He would go to drugs.

He would look at drugs to make himself feel better. The problem wasn't the drugs. The problem wasn't running to sexual relationships. The problem actually was the lie he believed. When God highlighted that and when he saw that it was actually the lie that he believed.

That he was worthless and that he was ugly. He realized that he was trying to fix that by running to other things, or to medicate, take the pain away. And really what he needed to do was to forgive his mother for the words that she spoke over him and then also repent for partnering with that lie.

Every lie that we believed is not God's truth over us. It's not what God says over us. When we partner with something that is not what God says over us, it's sin. It's sin. We have a faithful Father over our lives and His heart is always towards us.

He believes in us. He wants us to know that He loves us and that He's for us. It is really living by His truths over our lives and taking the truths of who we are in God's eyes into everyday life. I truly believe that if we truly accept ourselves the way the Father accepts us, we'll have really impactful lives to Jesus.

A lot of the struggles that we have, we won't have because we're living out of His point of view. You know, I think Jesus was utterly accepted by the Father and He knew that. I mean, we know He was, but He knew that, too.

Ungodly Beliefs, Lies, and Words Spoken Over People

He lived out of that place. I just want to mention as well a way that the Holy Spirit can really help us in our counseling. He often will speak. The word for Holy Spirit is "parakletos" in the Greek, and it means "to come alongside", it means counselor.

It's really often Him counseling and not us. We are just trying to follow what He's saying and what He's doing. And one of the ways that He can do that is by bringing up a memory. A memory really is a picture of something that's happened in the past.

And as we get the memory, we remember the past. And sometimes Holy Spirit can do that. He can, in the moment, bring up a memory. Some memories will be obvious as you're counseling somebody and you're writing down their life or their experiences. But some memories might actually be under the surface.

Might be subdued. As you're chatting with somebody and talking with them, suddenly a memory might come to someone's mind. So what I try and do is I reference that with people before I counsel them. To say, "I just want to let you know that if any memory comes to surface while we're talking, and no memory is too inconsequential. It could literally be a key for us to know what to pray into."

We obviously remember stuff all the time. But it's really the memories where wounding came into, where sin came into. The areas that we've actually got to bring to God, through repentance or forgiveness or through breaking a lie. Those are the things that we are trusting God to show us. God is really faithful because He loves people. He cares for them and He wants them free.

What I do is when somebody brings a memory, I ask them, "Why do you think that memory came to mind? What do you think the Lord is trying to show you? How did you feel in that memory? What did that memory bring to you? And what was the results of that memory?" If we can find the root cause, then we know what to pray into.

Using a Memory and Word of Knowledge to Find the Root Cause

So God actually helped me through an experience I had with a friend when I was counseling. Holy Spirit actually helped me in two ways. He gave me a word of knowledge and brought up a memory as a result. The word of knowledge I got for a friend while we were talking about his anger issues. It was the picture of a heavy metal band poster. I recognized the poster as being from a band called Iron Maiden and I mentioned that to him. "This might just be me, but it might be the Lord. Do you have any witness with this picture of this heavy metal band?"

And he said, "Yes, when I was younger, I used to go to my best friend's house regularly. And when I was at his house, we used to play violent games and we used to listen to heavy metal music." His best friend's father used to listen to the genre. I asked, "What did that make you feel in the home?" He said, "I would feel anger." We realized very quickly through that word of knowledge, but actually through the memory that came as a result of that word of knowledge, that that was the area to pray into.

So, we brought the video games to God and he repented for playing those video games. He acknowledged that those weren't games that God would be pleased in. And then he repented for partnering with listening to that music. He also forgave the parents for playing that music in the house and he forgave his friend for giving him those games to play with. Dealing with those sinful experiences.

After that, I asked, "How are you feeling?" He says, "Ant, I feel so much better. I feel like my anger is gone. But it's interesting, when we started praying, I actually felt like I wanted to punch you in the face." He said, "There was something in me that wanted to punch you in the face." Not only did the Holy Spirit very kindly show us the root of where his anger came into his life, but also exposed a demonic presence that attached itself. A spirit of anger that attached itself to those experiences, making that experience worse.

Point People to the Lord Through Healing Prayer

God came and delivered him from a demon as well. So, God is very kind and powerful. And as we end the session, I just want to encourage you just to point people to the Lord. We aren't people's answers, the Lord is. As we move from dialoguing with a person about their lives, we really want to transition people to be able to bring their stuff to God through healing prayer. And literally see Jesus come and set people free through the power of His name, and through the blood of Christ, and through the finished work of the cross.